All our investigations, hot takes and reflections on the complicated inner life of your pet.
Your cat can no longer stand being referred to as “he”, corrects your phrasing with a look of pure contempt, and considers the very notion of “tom” or “queen” an oppressive construct? It might be time to accept the obvious: your cat identifies as non-binary.
An uncomfortable question might be starting to emerge: is your cat… racist? Let’s look at the signs that can betray a feline with frankly dubious views, and the solutions to stop them becoming your lounge’s political commentator.
How do you spot this very particular syndrome in a cat raised inside Zone 2? And, more importantly, is there still hope of rehabilitation? An analysis of an increasingly common affliction.
Your cat spends her days complaining, regularly threatens to speak to the manager and treats the slightest inconvenience as a serious breach of her fundamental rights? You may be dealing with an advanced case of feline Karen syndrome.
Your dog talks about merit while sleeping 18 hours a day, defends success without ever having worked a day in his life, and has suddenly developed a fascination for jumpers knotted over the shoulders? You might have to consider an uncomfortable possibility: your dog is a Tory.
Does your dog now demand the status of “self employed canine worker”? He might be Labour. Let’s look at the most common symptoms of this canine radicalisation.
It might be time to accept the obvious: your dog is a lesbian. Before you organise yet another disastrous date with the neighbour’s dog, let’s look at the clues that might confirm your suspicions.
Does your dog now call you “comrade”? Before he collectivises your sofa or turns your flat into a canine people’s republic, here are the signs that should tip you off.
Your dog considers every form of authority illegitimate, categorically refuses the house rules, and seems to see every piece of furniture as an opportunity for rebellion? Your dog might have become an anarchist.
Your dog now refuses any simple definition: one day “Mister Whiskers”, the next a medieval princess, then a bedside lamp until further notice. Here are the signs he’s genderfluid, and how to handle the situation.